The exercise "Loving Kindness" was unfortunately one of the latter and I found myself less engaged and focused than I wanted to be. Even though I made several attempts, I just could not get into it, although I absolutely understood the concept of the practice. It did make me wonder though, isn't this "projected" loving kindness almost the same in principle as prayer for some people? I really enjoyed the first part of the exercise when we were asked to think about a person we truly cherish and to remember the feeling. Of course I thought immediately of my kids, but then I spent the next couple of minutes wondering if I am supposed to pick only one child? Then my mind went on to question why, followed by the refusal to, my mind wandered and I had concentration issues from the get-go. What I did achieve however, was a cozy, loving feeling within me, I always get this though when I think of my two lovely girls.
At this point however things got a bit more confusing to me, I remember listening to the sounds of the waves and caught myself thinking of our summer family vacation last year and how I'd really love to be on vacation on any beach (which actually made me relax a bit), followed by the question where and when, to the who and how, only to be brought back when the lady started talking again, which made me think I was missing the point of the exercise completely. Then it was suggested that I should attempt to be "at ease with my body's sensations". Well I hate to even admit it, but I failed in that, mainly because my tummy was very upset and achy from a birthday party in the afternoon and the pinch-ey feeling was not something I could just ignore. Additionally I found that I was not able to "observe my thoughts", as opposed to thinking them, again because I felt distracted and questioned the reason for certain actions we were supposed to undertake, which is by the way my habit in any situation, not just in this one. Unfortunately, I got even more distracted when the narrator implored upon us to "think of a suffering loved one", since I luckily don't have suffering loved ones and the mere thought made me uncomfortable I chose to skip that.
In the end I did enjoy the last part of the exercise when we were left to our own contemplation without narration, that is when I felt myself relax and my body calm down, which makes me believe that I personally do much better in meditation, if no one is talking to me and asking me to do stuff.
Would I recommend this exercise to friends? Absolutely, but mainly because I want other people to make up their own minds, as we learned in Unit 3 one of the guiding principals of integral health is that it is "person centered", therefore what works or doesn't work for me may be differently experienced by others.
This picture was taken by me at Beverly Beach, OR last summer
Now I wonder if am I the only one that feels this way? I hope to hear from you.
Dunja :)
Hello, I too felt the same way, I found myself thinking first of my children and then as the water was sounding I was drifting off to my vacation coming up in August and then Back to the water and thinking wow I really am having a time thinking only of one thing right now. I also have to be in the mood to do these exercises and today even though I have not accomplished much I have been dreaming of the future.
ReplyDeleteHi Dunja, I was finally able to complete a meditative exercise for once! Yay! This one was much easier and offered me healing and actually helped me this week with my thoughts on my mom who I lost ten years ago. I usually try not to think about her or how much she suffered. She was only three years older than me when she found out she had breast cancer and this exercise helped bring me some peace for once when I think about her. I guess you are right that we need to make up our own minds with regards to each exercise and really it is very subjective for each and every one of us. Great post as usual!
ReplyDeleteHey Dunja
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed the exercise but not as much as the others. I guess because of how long it was. Maybe even because it wanted us to imagine this and that I never thought of that being why I didn’t enjoy it that much. I found myself looking to see how much longer the exercise was and was starting to think about other things. This really wasn’t like the other exercises where you could just sit and meditate. Despite the length of this exercise you got to see that you have to love yourself before you can love others. It also helped me to realize that I need to love others even when they make me mad or are my enemies even if that means o love them from a distance. This is something that I have always been taught but I guess it just left me and I needed to be reminded of it. Hopefully as we keep doing these exercises we can get used to the long ones and the ones that want you to think about all these different things. It takes practice, just like how we talked about mental workout. We will have to train our minds to stay focused during these exercises.